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Family purity)
In Judaism, niddah (or nidah, nidda, nida; Hebrew) is technically a state of minor "exclusion" when a woman is menstruating and for about a week later until she immerses in a ritual bath known as a mikvah.
Niddah is the main category of a group of laws and customs that is generally called by the euphemism family purity (taharat hamishpacha).
Niddah is also the name of a tractate (volume) in the Talmud, which deals almost exclusively with the subject.
Biblical sources
The Torah teaches: "Do not draw close to a woman when she is a niddah; (sexual intercourse) relations are forbidden (at that time)." (Leviticus: 15:19-24, 18:19, 20:18). From this, the laws relating to "ritual purity" or "family purity" and niddah are derived.
The extent to which these laws are followed depend on the movements within Judaism. These laws are strictly followed in the more traditional Orthodox Judaism, and are often reinterpreted in the progressive movements such as in Reform Judaism as a mechanism of rediscovering female spirituality. See below for the Conservative view on the niddah laws.
What is Niddah?
A woman becomes a niddah when blood comes from her womb due to her monthly period known as the menstrual cycle or for other reasons, such as following childbirth or due to sexually transmitted disease. She might see the flow, or she might see a stain on her clothing. There must be some indication that the blood has come from her womb; if she finds a stain just after cutting her finger, she does not become a niddah, as the blood is obviously not uterine. If she finds blood on her underclothing, and she does not know if it is from a cut or from her womb, she needs to check with someone who knows the relevant laws such as a learned rabbi who studied the sections of niddah in the Talmud and the Shulkhan Arukh. Knowledge of these laws is essential for rabbis - without it they cannot attain ordination.
Jewish law states that a women enters the state of "tameh" when she is "niddah" (menstruating). During this time a couple refrains from physical contact, especially sexual relations. Technical terms like "tahor" and "tameh" are often poorly translated; they have nothing to do with physical cleanliness. Rather, they describe a state of ritual purity in regards to fulfilling Biblical commandments. The terms Tahor and Taharah actually mean "ritually pure" and Tamae and Tumah mean "ritually impure".
What it is "not"
Being niddah might mean "exclusion" (or, according to one commentator: "obstruction of normal function"), it is certainly not regarded as "negative" in any other way. Although there is no physical contact between the partners, the time can serve to develop a more emotional relationship that extends beyond sexuality.
In religious philosophy, the laws of Niddah are referred to as "a hedge of roses" (Song of Songs 7:3 as interpreted by Midrash Shir ha-Shirim Rabba 7:7). There is certainly a separation (hedge) but it is of a pleasant nature, and the reunification after the mikvah can (and should be) romantic.
Need for Tahara - "purity"
A woman is a niddah until she undergoes taharah ("purification"). The taharah process involves a minimum of twelve days, most often thirteen. These are divided into two sets of time, the "first five days", and "seven days of taharah", after which she must immerse properly in a mikvah (ritual bath).
A woman who does not go through the taharah process cannot become tahor ("pure", the "opposite" state from niddah), even if an extended period of time has elapsed since her last period.
However, it may happen that if she swam in a lake, river, or the sea, which are all good as natural mikvahs then she becomes tahor until her next menstrual period. Again, consultation with a rabbi is required to determine if this is sufficient.
Guiding marital relations
Any act that could lead to sexual relations whilst a woman is a niddah is forbidden according to the Torah and rabbinic law. Since a husband and wife are very accustomed to being physically intimate with each other, therefore they must take great care during the time the woman is niddah. They must relate completely on a non-physical level. Traditionally, they do not hug or kiss each other, or even pass each other items from hand to hand. These laws are termed "harchakot" ("spacers"), to ensure "one thing will not lead to another".
Calculation of the niddah period
The first five days begin when a woman first sees her monthly vaginal blood flow. She counts from the beginning of the flow, and continues until the flow stops. If it takes less than five days for her flow to stop, she still has to wait until five days are over. Even if she saw blood for only one day, she must wait five days until she can begin the seven-day taharah ("purification") process. The five days need not be complete five days. The first day might start in the middle of the day, if she first saw her flow in the afternoon. But whenever they began, they end on the night after the fifth day.
If she sees blood for more than five days, the "five days" end when she has definitely stopped seeing blood. Once she has stopped seeing blood, she can begin the count of the "Seven White Days". "Stopped seeing blood" means that she has stopped seeing either a flow of blood or stains on her clothing completely. These days begin when the woman, before sunset, takes a shower or bath, and cleans herself thoroughly, everywhere. She then waits a few minutes, and inserts a cloth and checks herself at the opening of her vagina with her finger. If it comes out clean, then the next day is the "first day" of the "Seven White Days". During this period, the woman must check herself twice a day: when she gets up, and just before sunset.
Checking with a white cloth
Checking is done with an absolutely clean piece of white cloth. Often, such cloths are available at the local mikvah. The woman first checks the cloth very carefully to make sure it is clean of any marks. She then places her finger in the center of the cloth, and allows the cloth to wrap around her fingers, and the pushes the cloth so that every surface inside her vagina is touched by the cloth. She removes the cloth, and checks it very carefully. If it comes out free of any mark, it is good. If the cloth has a mark, she looks at the color. A red or black mark means there is still discharge of blood. White or very pale yellow is not a problem. Colors like brown, dark yellow, gold, and pink, are very problematic.
Traditional women would then bring the cloth to the rabbi most learned and qualified in this area of Jewish law and practice, who examines the cloth and is then able to determine whether it is Niddah blood or not. Not even all Orthodox Judaism rabbis have the special training that allows them to make this determination, and they will defer to someone else.
Traditionally, during these days, the woman should wear white underwear and uses white bed linens. Of course, any staining during this period is watched for as it may revert the woman back to "day one" of her becoming a niddah.
Immersing in the mikvah
When the Seven White Days are over, that night, the woman goes to the mikvah. This is the same day of the week the "Seven White Days" began. To prepare for the mikvah, after checking, the woman takes a bath, followed by a shower, and other careful preparations. She cleans and cuts all her nails, both finger and toe, as well as making sure there is no food between her teeth. She cleans her ears, and every body cavity. She removes all makeup, and combs her hair completely. Many women take the bath at home, and do the follow-up shower at the mikvah.
When going to the mikvah, she may not have anything between her and the water at any part of her body. Therefore she must remove all jewelry, makeup, and things regarded as "obstructions". There is usually a woman attendant at the mikvah to help the woman check that she is ready to immerse. During the immersion, the woman makes sure that she is completely immersed (including all hair). There are appropriate blessings said.
Resuming conjugal relations
The woman then returns home, and informs her husband that she is now in the tahora ("purified") state. Sexual marital relations are then permitted (in fact, tradition dictates they occur that night). Biologically speaking, the best night to conceive is usually "mikvah night", as it often coincides with the woman's ovulation. The sperm count of her husband is increased during the abstinence and by the time of self-restraint, which improves the chances of successful pregnancy.
Other separation days
Torah law also forbids sexual relations on the day that a woman expects her period, called her veset. She should know when to expect her period by keeping a careful record. On three days the veset is in force: on the same day of the month since the start of her period, 30 days after the last period, and a third one (to follow). Generally, these more-or-less coincide, unless a woman's period is often longer than 30 days.
Other related traditions
Traditionally, a vital factor of the Laws of Family Purity is the concept of tzeniut (meaning "modesty" or "hiddenness"). A woman's personal matters are nobody's business but hers, her husband's when he needs to know, her doctor's, and her Rabbi's when and if the rabbi needs to know. Women do not discuss these matters with others, nor are private bedroom matters supposed to be the subject of jokes or light conversation.
Reasons for the niddah laws
The traditional view has been that these are "Laws of Holiness", and serve to elevate the physical to the highest spiritual level. It takes a physical aspect and adds holiness to it, using the physical for spiritual gain. As society has rediscovered the importance of spirituality, these laws are being rediscovered, and are even being adopted, to varying extents, by the progressive movements in Judaism.
Sex in Judaism
In Judaism, marital relations are considered to be a gift from God. They are neither shunned nor avoided. However, they are not debased either. Rather, Judaism provides a way to use sex to elevate the human being. By following self-control and discipline that can lead to holiness. During the time that a man and woman are forbidden to have sexual relations in traditional Judaism, they are forced to relate to each other in non-physical ways. They must see each other in other terms, and develop their relationship with each other on a spiritual and emotional level.
Views of Conservative Judaism
The official stance of Conservative Judaism on this issue is the same as that of Orthodox Judaism. However, according to some scholars within Conservative Judaism, the extra seven days of waiting was initially a custom of the pious. In this view, its incorporation into the Jewish law codes stemmed from the fact that the rabbis were unaware of the exact duration of menstrual cycles. Contradictory statements in the Talmud and in the works of Nahmanides and Maimonides led to the seven days becoming mandatory rather than optional. However, say some Conservative figures, this longer period is in contradiction to Mishnaic and Talmudic statements. The Conservative movement's Committee on Jewish Law and Standards has not issued any formal position on this issue. However, some individuals have ruled that the extra days are not mandatory. These include Rabbis Joel Roth, Michael Gold, Susan Grossman, Daniel Kohn and JTS Talmud Professor David C. Kraemer.
While the practices related to family purity are not widely followed among its laity, Conservative Judaism nonetheless teaches that these practices are just as important as other parts of Jewish law.
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Last updated: 10-29-2005 02:13:46
